The Fluffers

Fluffers is my official recommendation as the new team/brand name replacement for the Minnesota Timberwolves.  I’d settle for Fluffies.  About the best you can hope for them is to keep other teams warmed up for serious play.

They can always change it once they become something more as the result of luck and more lotto picks.   Maybe a name that goes with the blue they seem committed to like an obsessive compulsive retard, like the Icefish.  But that would be truth in advertising, so the NBA would have to drop all its Sprite and McDonalds marketing.

At least Fluffers has the advantage of bringing new, fun, enthusiastic fans into the building that don’t care what’s happening on the court.  No big contracts to worry about, just get the youngest, fluffiest players available.  They could have special nights for furries (they already have a fitting mascot) and various other sexual parties.  Forget family nights altogether and just go for the stadium-sized orgy market.

Some other forgotten names I’ve used for them in the past:

• Ice Doggies (and again)
• Ice Pups
• Snow Pups
• Snow Hounds (a nicer version of above)
• Timbabitches (as in, we continue to have gender malfunctions with our drafts and trades)
• Blizzard.  This is a great name I never actually called them but wanted them to be called back when the franchise began and I took sports seriously.  I think it’s since been grabbed by some other team with far better marketing skills than the people running the Fluffers or NBA.
• Icicles
• Icedrops
• Snowfall

Tags: advertising, basketball, brands, fluffers, furries, hoops, icefish, marketing, Minnesota, names, NBA, Pups, Sports, teams, Timberwolves